I remember back in 1999 I went to visit my older sister in Arizona. She was really into Calgon's morning glory body splash at the time. For those of you who are unaware, Calgon is that cheesy drug store body spray pictured to the left, with several different scents, each reminiscent of a horrid bouquet of flowers. The morning glory scent, in particular, seems to be a favorite amongst Calgon fans near and far, yet it stirs up images of Grandma trying to cover up the obvious fact she has not showered in 10 days.
In college, one of my closest friends was a fan of Calgon's morning glory. She rarely left the house without 5 or 6 squirts. Overkill to say the least. Then, to my dismay, my younger sister had been swooned by the Morning Glory-- she too had became a fan of the blue calgon spray. I chalked this up as a "college phase"; told myself, "she will overcome this travesty... i just know she will... she has to". Thankfully I had not found reason to conjure up these thoughts in quite some time.
For the past couple of months, on several occasions, I have entered the women's bathroom at work and been blown away by the revolting morning glory smell. At first I thought to myself, "Am I really smelling this malodorous disaster again? In the case it is not just Lauren delirium, WHO is be to blame for such a foul sense of right from oh-so-wrong?"
Now some months later, I have FINALLY solved the Calgon Morning Glory Mystery. And the responsible party happens to be a coworker from my very office.
Confused? Yes!
Ashamed? Heck yea!
Appalled? Of course!!
She shall remain nameless-- but this seemingly innocent coworker of mine claims to spray her Calgon in an attempt to "cover up" a worse smell. I say ENOUGH!! Calgon lingers. It stays in the bathroom all day. Its like that putrid sunflower that sits in a water filled vase and rots 10 days after it has blossomed. If you have that much to cover up then do your business at home. Let us bathroom in a peaceful unscented environment.
For the sake of small bladders that have no choice but to frequent the vicinities, for the sake of humanity, for the sake of human compassion, keep Calgon away from the work place.
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